You Can Keep Your Shirtless Actor

Right now I am sitting in my office, which is to say that I’m in the extra bedroom on the second floor of my home on the side facing the street.  It is 4:46 and since my husband’s work day ends at 4:45 and he teleworked today, he is no longer sitting at the computer across from mine, the place where I leave him little notes like this when he’s on Very Important Calls about Very Important Subjects.

Instead of hearing the click-clacking of his keyboard, I hear his voice wafting in through the windows on a strangely-cool-for-June breeze, mixed with our son’s voice, a distant lawnmower, the occasional chirp from a bird, and the distinctive sound of a basketball hitting first the asphalt driveway and then the backboard.  Our daughter has abandoned us all for a program on a favorite educational site that allows her to create animated stories using some of her favorite TV characters.  The cat has passed out at the top of the stairs, oblivious to all of it.  Another lawnmower joins the Friday afternoon chorus…

Right now in my inbox there is an invitation to attend an event tonight where I can meet two A-list actors, preview a movie that is sure to be a summer blockbuster, and spend time with local bloggers.

And I can’t even begin to muster one ounce of care about any of it.

So the truth is that the part about spending time with the local bloggers sounds nice.  But tonight, it doesn’t sound nicer than hot dogs on the grill, eating on the deck, tucking the kids in a bit early, and watching House Hunters in bed with my husband, windows still open, strangely-cool-for-June breeze still rolling in.

It is an odd thing to be a confusing combination of thrill-seeker and homebody, the kind of person who will fly across the ocean to visit a foreign country for just 48 hours but who is exhausted by the idea of taking the Metro into the city for the night.  

I think it must be cyclical, like my occasional months-long stints of eyeliner use that I suddenly abandon, my favorite charcoal gray pencil shoved to the back of the makeup drawer.  May of this year held only 19 days when my husband and I were both in our home at the same time.  That’s  a lot of lonely nights of responding to every perspective homeowner who crosses the threshold and immediately exclaims, “It’s larger than I expected!” by saying, “That’s what she said,” only to look around and realize that the cat is not amused and is going to care less which home they eliminate first after the next commercial break.

We’re only three weeks into the month, yet June has already seen me on a train to and from NYC twice, once just for the day.  And I’m tired.  Tired.

The result is that I am nesting.  I am having restless nights filled with crazy dreams of misplaced children and ordering wood samples from thinking that I may finally order a much-needed buffet for my long ignored dining room.  I’ve been waiting all week for Saturday so that I can clean my house from top to bottom.  And I may even clean out the kids’ closets just for kicks.

So tonight I will stay home.  The invitation was lovely.  This life is amazing.  But tonight, you can keep your shirtless actor.  I want need nothing more than my family.

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  • anne hill


  • I got the same invitation and didn’t go. We had a Friday night that included no less than 3 different places to be, and I choose the pool, swim team, swim team social, and contraband wine. Some times, you just can’t be everywhere, and everything to everyone so you have to choose. I picked Michael’s mom, 8 and under swimmer, and he wanted to be there, chanting things like SWIM FAST!

    • We may have made a good choice. Just saw this on FB while asking around for Spanish app ideas:

      “So, the event tonight had a few hiccups. There was to be a reception, followed by red carpet, then a screening of the movie. That all happened, but not all the people who were registered properly made it in. Tickets were handed out to just about anyone who entered the reception. Not good. We were suppose to get two tickets, but were only able to score one. So, I did not go in. I cannot tolerate unorganized events or host who do not try to amend the situation.”

      And you know what, sometimes it’s not even about not being able to be everywhere. It’s about not wanting to be everywhere. I don’t know if I’m getting old or tired or what, but things that used to sound like fun are less appealing to me these days! I just got my butt kicked soundly at Monopoly and am about to watch an awful lot of HGTV and that sounds like a perfect Friday night to me right now.

  • Love this post! This is so where I am this summer.

    • There’s something about summer that just begs us to slow down. I’m going to listen this year.

  • I skipped it too in favor of family time and have absolutely no regrets! Have a wonderful evening with your family and a fabulous weekend!

    • I hope your family time didn’t include getting your butt handed to you in Monopoly like mine did! 😉

  • Amy

    I am happily on my bed, surrounded by cats, dogs, and daughter, watching the end of the Princess Bride before switching to House Hunters. This IS the good life! Except for the part where now my daughter thinks we need new countertops. I blame HGTV.

    • Amy, Princess Bride was on two networks at the same time last night. I’m pretty sure that’s how you know it’s a good night.

  • To me this just shows that you value what you work for, not just the work itself. I’ve had jobs I was unhappy in, maybe not all the time, but sometimes. Even if I liked the work and enjoyed the challenge, I’d be on a business trip and on some level I resented that which took me away from where I really wanted to be.

    • Yes, you’ve hit the nail on the head. The point of creating the business I’ve created was to be home with my kids, so at a certain point, not being with my kids defeats the whole purpose.

  • I also spent the night with my son. We just enjoyed the moment of being together doing something regular. He beat me in gaming. And that is fine for me. I’ll see the celebrities another night. I agree with another commenter who said, we work hard so we can enjoy moments like these with our families.

    • Isn’t it amazing how being beat by a child at a game can be the definition of a pleasant way to pass an evening?

  • I’m sucking up as much of mu family as I can this weekend before I fly off to Germany Sunday afternoon. I miss them already! I “nest” every weekend since I’m working in an office all week long.

    • Glad I’m not the only one who like to hunker down on the weekends!

  • What a wonderful post – I’m turning into a bit of a homebody too! I get so excited when invitations come but as the event draws closer staying home with family is often more appealing.

  • I also go the same invite, but already had plans to attend the Savvy Blogging Summit last weekend so passed on the White House Down screening, since I was out in Cincinnati honing my bloggy skills. Totally agree w/ your post; sometimes I favor a quiet night with my family.