Today is the three year anniversary of the first time I wrote a blog post. Before that there had been a Geocities community – what were those? – and I had a Facebook account that I populated far too frequently. There were also the scores of emails that I wrote during bedrest with my husband’s laptop balanced on my giant tummy, the internet cable running all the way down the stairs to the family room. Those emails would have made great blog posts, but they would have had to remain anonymous. I was not a happy bedrester. But it was on this day in 2008 that I wrote two long posts and hit publish for the first time on Resourceful Mommy.
Saying Goodbye to Fernando: I wrote about my couch. Well, actually, it was a double papasan from Pier One. I bought it right before I moved in with my best friend who took her own life in 2003. It was also the place where my husband and I shared our first kiss, and likely our first many other things as well. It was a concrete, material symbol of my youth. And I gave it away.
…At my husband’s urging I turned to Freecycle where I knew some thankful freecycler would read my post and instinctively hit the respond button, their heart racing, reflexes jumping, hoping to reply to my listing first. I knew that to truly find a new owner, I’d have to be creative. My listing read as follows:
This offer is for a Pier One double papasan (the loveseat sized version of the papasan chair) that answers to the name of Fernando. Fernando has been a true friend over the years, but we need to find him a new forever home. He was where I was sitting when my now husband stole his first kiss (or did I do the stealing?), he gave me a cozy place to sit when my daughter cried in the night, and he witnessed lots of family fun. Unfortunately, he’s being pushed out by our new friends – large,plastic toys. If you’ve got a place in your home for Fernando, please let me know. No resales or donations, please. Thanks!
And then I had to get real…
p.s. Preference given to anyone who can pick up before Friday.
So why am I having such a hard time getting rid of an old piece of cheap furniture? I don’t think it’s Fernando at all – I think it’s what Fernando represents to me…
Motorcycles and Mustangs: Clearly something happens in a person’s life that makes them say, “Hey, start a blog!” I know that for many people it was the birth of their first child, but for me, it was in many ways to avoid having a third. In fact, I often joke that this blog is my third child. It’s also my dog, my vacation home, my hot Latin lover (I’ve named him Pablo Escobar), and yes, it’s my motorcycle.
…So when does this happen in a mother’s life? When does a woman get to the point where her former self is so far in the distant past that she hurls at the speed of light towards what feels very much like a man’s mid-life crisis? For me it’s occurring at the nexus of several milestones. First and foremost, as of the winter of 2008, I no longer have any living grandparents. In much the same way that I viscerally felt myself slide one notch up the mortality ladder upon the birth of my first child, I once again felt that jolt when my parents became orphaned senior citizens.
Then there’s the seven year itch. This August will mark my seventh wedding anniversary, and although I’m in no way itching to quit the habit that is my amazing husband, I am itching for something – I just can’t put my finger on what that something is.
To make matters infinitely worse, my daughter is four, my son is two, and my body would like another baby. Did I say like? My body is trying desperately to convince my mind that it must have another baby now! While there is no way that my mind will lose this argument, due partly to the fact that my husband wants nothing to do with the idea of more children, nature is a powerful opponent. It’s amazing what millions of years of evolution can do to mess with the psyche of the average suburban house-mom.
So I’ve decided I need that motorcycle…
I considered not blogging at all today on this milestone date, content in enjoying the irony. Then I considered looking over the last year of blog posts to choose my favorites, but there are hundreds of them, and it’s a Friday night. When I sat down and re-read those first two posts that I felt I needed to share with the world, I was struck by how much I still feel those same emotions tonight three years later. I’m amazed at how they still resonate and even move me to tears.
So I’m celebrating tonight the simple fact that I’ve been given the gift to share those feelings through words, the platform on which to do it, and you, the readers who take the time to feel those things with me.
Thank you, for three incredible years.