Siblings at Birthday Parties

I distinctly remember wanting desperately to be included in my older brother’s parties when I was a kid from his sleepovers with just a couple of the boys in his class to the volleyball game in the backyard when he turned fifteen to – and I cannot believe  I’m admitting this – the night my friend Jen and I hid under the dining room table to watch his friends coming in after the Junior Prom.

I will always be the little sister, so I tend to side with my younger child, feeling bad for him when his big sister hangs “No Boys Allowed” signs on her door or tells him that he absolutely cannot spend time with her and her playdate pals.  This is why I was so excited when my kids worked with me to come up with a crazy plan for my daughter’s 8th birthdy party – Siblings Invited!  Three of my daughter’s favorite friends have younger siblings that are either the same age or close to the same age as my son, so when we sent out the invitation, we included the little brothers and sisters as well.

While there were the occasional moments when big sister battled little or big brother tried to outshine his little brother during a party game, in general the party with siblings included worked out great, and both of my kids were happy that we included everyone.  It was wonderful to see how proud the little ones were to be invited to a big kid party, and some of the older kids enjoyed playing with the younger siblings of their friends.  One sibling set even brought a gift for my son so he had something to open while big sis opened her gifts!

If I can get my son on board later this spring when he turns six, this is definitely something worth trying again.


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  • We just did this with my daughters birthday party in January. All siblings were invited and we had a great time!!!

  • My younger brother was born 5 days before my 3rd birthday. We had joint birthdays every year growing up. I didn’t mind sharing until I hit my pre-teen years. At 12, I refused to even help plan my 13th (his 10th) party unless I got to have it without my brother. Thankfully, my mom understood and let me have one without him. It is forever engrained in my brain!

    Being the big sibling is hard, too. I remember getting blamed for the younger kids misbehaving because I was older and “should have known better.”

  • All I can say is that I can’t believe that you didn’t invite me to hide under the table with you. 🙂 I love sibling parties- it creates such a sweet and memorable bond. And I am glad your big brother had you for a sister!

    • Can you believe I did that?!? I bet you remember those parties even better than I do, my face pressed up against the glass 🙂

  • I always try to have at least one sibling pair in attendance. Two of my boys are just ten months apart (though not in the same grade–so right now they are both 5, but not twins), and so the “left out” feeling is REALLY intense with them if we don’t include the non-birthday-kid in some way.

  • My middle daughter just attended a party last month where siblings were allowed to attend. My youngest daughter was thrilled to be able to go too. I was concerned that she wouldn’t know anyone else there (other than her big sis) but she had a great time regardless. I thought it was a great idea and we are considering that for both of their summer birthdays.