She Gave Me an iPad

Saturday night I found myself in the hotel bar at the BlogHer Conference in New York City.  In past years you’d find me dancing on the stage, screaming loudly when a Rob Bass song started, hugging the people around me and “squeeing” loudly.  This year I hung up my dancing shoes and instead found a cozy couch, a fountain coke, and a bowl of spicy chips.  I surrounded myself with women who love me and who I love, trust, admire, and enjoy.  The lure of a d.j. and 2,000 women having fun no longer drew me in.  Conversation among friends that feel as comfortable to me as family instead kept me planted on that velvety couch, the quiet buzz of friends’ voices the only noise ringing in my ears.

I saw a new friend across the room and got up to say hello.  He was headed to the ballroom upstairs, and I pointed over to my posse indicating that that was where I would be should he want to sit and chat.  He said, “I don’t think I know anyone over there.” I smiled and shared that these are the women who fly under the radar, keep their noses to the grindstone, and support each other in a way that is hard to explain.

So this is how I’ll explain it.

A couple months ago one of our crew won a contest that came with an amazing second gift – the same prize package for a friend.  This prize included full sponsorship to the conference and an iPad 3.  I put out there that I don’t need the sponsorship, but sure would love to finally own an iPad.  My friend Jenn said she really needed that sponsorship, but already had an iPad.  In a Facebook room on a whim we vowed to split the prize with each other should our mutual friend draw one of our names. And then her name was drawn.

At this point many people would say that they spoke in haste and in fact their kids could use the old iPad while the new one could be for work.  Maybe her husband needed one?  Or perhaps money was tight and selling it would be a better idea.

But do you know what she did?  She gave me her word.  And then she gave me an iPad.

She brought it to me in the bar that night with her remote charger so we could power it up.  She told me about apps for photographs that I would definitely want to check out.  She handed it over joyfully.

Does friendship mean giving each other gifts? Of course not. But there is something so selfless and pure about the intention behind her actions, and it is what I’ve seen mirrored in other interactions among this group – kind words, technical support, a smile, promotion with no strings attached, a hug.

I have been writing for four years and have gotten to know some of the most amazing people I’ve ever met in my life.  We have seen and done and experienced the kinds of things that I could not have imagined before I joined this crazy online world.  But none of that can top the peaceful feeling that comes from the blessing of true friendship, friendship that needs no glitz or glamour, no loud squeals, but instead is communicated through a knowing look or the squeezing of a hand.  Sitting on a couch in a hotel bar, playing together on a new iPad…

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  • Jenn

    I derive great pleasure in the friendships I have formed with the same said group of people. I also derive great pleasure from the act of “paying it forward” … from seeing people smile.

    Love you


  • Christine M

    Now that is what I like to call a true friend <3

  • I feel the same way about all of you. Having dinner and drinks with you all at The London was one of the highlights of the trip. It was just good to see your smiles, hear your voices, and hug your necks.

  • I just love this. Wish i could have been there with you guys!

  • I love this moment and I’m glad you had it. Amy, I know you’ve been struggling with your post-BlogHer feelings but I want to stand squarely in front of you and tell you that this intimacy and lack of glitter is how I enjoy conferences. I do not squeal. I have trouble suffering squealers. And I reserve most all of my dancing for this one weekend a year, and maybe one or two others.

    BlogHer doesn’t have to be big and brash. It has never been about competition or stuff for me, not ever, not once. I appreciate it for what it can do that I can’t: get all of my friends and acquaintances (and their friends and acquaintances that I just might like in person) all together in one place at the same time. After that, I’m on my own.

    I’d like to think it will never be too big for me. Because it is always as small as I need it to be. I understand and respect that not everyone feels the same (good grief, our feeds are FULL of that struggle right now). With that in mind, I’m glad you created this moment and wish you luck as you sort out the rest.

  • Another reason I love sitting and chatting with you guys vs dancing with a unicorn head on my shoulders. 😉 I loved our late night chats and treasure those more than a glow stick and “bragging rights” that I was at some party.

    And Jenn?? Is a rockstar. We all knew that!

  • […] She Gave Me an iPad by Amy from Resourceful Mommy – The conference moment that had the most impact for Amy was sharing a few minutes in the lobby with a friend….and a new iPad. […]

  • I love this post. To me, BlogHer was about the small moments with the people who I know deeply and personally, getting to see them again and spend quality time with them. The spaces between were punctuated with parties and big loud gatherings, but the value of the conference, to me, has always been those personal moments.

  • I too treasured the more quiet moments with friends this year and didn’t make it to one of the BlogHer parties in favor of connecting with those I usually interact with most often online. So many times people don’t think the friends that we have connected to online first are true friends. This example, and so many others, indicates just how wrong those naysayers are! 🙂

  • Mary Cummings

    I could feel the genuine friendship bond you and your friend share in your writing. What a blessing it is to have friends like that!

  • That is so awesome Amy…congrats on all of it – the wonderful friendship, the iPad and the memories of this year’s BlogHer event. 🙂

  • Happy Dance!!!! I love that I know people like this – and like me – where it isn’t about the things or the stuff, it is just about being nice and thoughtful of others.

  • For those who don’t read this, or read it and don’t ‘get it,’ I feel sad. Little things, moments can manifest into the largest, most important moments if we nurture them. I have to remind myself to remove the descriptor ‘blogger, online, social media’ before the word friend more times lately than not. Happy for you, my friend.

  • I love it! Cheers to real people who are kind and generous. They keep the world bright.

  • Amy

    Dude, my heart. Thank you for sharing yours, you know I love you.

  • This is beautiful and one of the things I love most that has come from blogging, aside from the love of writing, I love the community and the true friends I have made. I have made connections that I never could have imagined were even possible.

  • I’m in love with this post. This is what I hope to have one day with my online friends. Actually, I see us as having it now, it’s just so new that we are excited to even have one another to talk with on a daily basis. I still have IRL friends and family that don’t get the friendships i’ve made online. They call them fake, or sub-par to offline relationships. I see them as being more real than any other relationship I could have. An online friendship has no choice but to be transparent or else it will perish. And during a busy conference when you have to choose between dancing your ass off or talking quietly with a friend about nothing, and anything, you see how deep that friendship is.

  • Love this post, thanks for sharing…and inspiring!!

  • Sounds like she has integrity that can be found in very few people. That my friend is rare. Wish I ran into you again this past weekend. Perhaps in Chicago next yr.

  • That is awesome. It’s nice to see that there are still people like that in this world.

  • I love hearing stories of people who have made true friends in this space. Thanks for sharing, Amy.

  • It is a perfect example of true friendship, the giving (in whatever form, material or otherwise) with no expectation of reciprocation.