When you make the decision to blog, you are effectively making the decision to put yourself on the chopping block. You are submitting yourself for judgement, opening yourself up to public scrutiny. When you begin to find popularity in blogging, that analysis is taken to another level. You essentially blog with a target on your back, and at times this means that people will say and do hurtful things.
The first time this happened to me in a big way, friends implored me to write a retaliation post:
“Defend yourself against that lying $#*@^!”
“Don’t let her turn you into linkbait!”
“Tell your side of the story!”
Instead, I chose to write “I Used to Be Angry,” which is still a piece I turn to when looking for calm in the storm.
“I used to be angry…
…and I would also say there was a healthy dose of bitter.
I was one of those girls who decided people in high school probably didn’t like me…because I was too smart.(hold the laughter, please)
I listened to an awful lot of Tori Amos in college, and an unhealthy overload of Ani DiFranco in grad school. I even rocked out to “Hello City” by Bare Naked Ladies with the express purpose of throwing hate in the direction of Philadelphia, the city I didn’t enjoy living in at the time.
But like most angry teenagers, I grew up, married a wonderful man – who by the way, is never angry about anything – and I stopped being a Bitter Betty. Then I became pregnant with my first child…..and became very ill. Any of you who know me in real life know how ugly Amy=pregnant can be. Bed rest, vomiting, trips to the hospital, extreme weight loss, torn muscles….long story.
But the worst of it was when I gave birth to my daughter two months early after doctors ignored my pleas that something was wrong and thus changed the trajectory of my entire parenting experience.”